If you are a woman looking for a serious relationship, meaning you want date someone with the prospect of getting married ( or at least in an exclusive committed relationship) within a reasonable time, you need to be aware of the types of men to avoid at all costs when dating.
These types of men will be most likely just a waste of your time and energy in your quest for Mr Right and can often become a source of pain and heartbreaks.
I nailed down a list of 7 types of guys to avoid in dating, some which I encountered myself – I learned my lesson the hard way -.
In the real world, those types of men are not mutually exclusive and you will often encounter men with one or many of those traits at the same time.
1. The playboy
I can’t believe that there are still women falling for the playboy even when they are looking for a committed serious relationship.
The playboy is himself a big red flag.
I know how charming these men can be…They have practiced it for years.
They have all the money and lifestyle to impress you and play one your emotions. It is very easy to let yourself go into believing that you are so special and that he has really fallen in love with you.
My dear, you are very special, but he has not fallen in love with you.
This type of guy is addicted to having as many women as he can, be it one at a time, which means as soon as he is done with you, he will be looking for the next prey.
Take it as a general rule, when someone is too charming, he is 99% trouble.
2. The commitment-phobe
It goes without saying that a commitment phone will have a hard time committing to you because that is his phobia, which defies the purpose of even dating him with a view of getting married.
Without going into the reasons why he is a commitment-phone ( because the purpose of the blog post is not to get into men’s head), you need to be able to recognize the signs of a commitment-phobe guy early enough so that you can move on before starting to invest emotionally into him.
What are the signs that you can spot early on?
- Past relationships: If it seems that he has an impressive collection of short term relationships, or he does not talk much about his past ( because he precisely wants to hide it).
- If he avoids talking about future plans with you.
- If he tells you he is not “ready” check out my article on when a man says he is not “ready” for a relationship.
- If he says he needs some “space” when you tell him that you are ready to take your relationship to the next level.
To be honest, I don’t think that these men are afraid of commitment itself, but I think that they are so idealistic in their minds that they are looking for a very specific person to commit to ( the perfect unicorn ).
In the meantime, they want to date other women for various reasons including to satisfy their sexual needs, or to fit in a certain social standard, or because they simply need some company.
So they are essentially using the women they are with until they find their perfect match and that’s when they leave that woman.
Ladies, please wise up, learn to recognize the signs early on in the relationship and just cut your losses.
3. The ambiguous guy
Have you ever thought “What does it really mean” after a man told you something you did not really understand?
And let me guess, you called and texted all your friends asking them for their expert opinion hoping that one of them will have the right explanation to what you just heard from this guy because it was too ambiguous for you…things like “ You never know, I might marry you one day” or “ let’s not lose contact” after he dumped you.
Ambiguity is a deal-breaker for me. Why? Because available men are never ambiguous, they cannot afford to take a chance to be misunderstood.
So when a guy is giving you these ambiguous statements, he is not really into you but wants to keep you hooked so that he keeps all his options opened.
Often times these guys were just looking for a rebound relationship after a breakup but never really liked you.
Why would he lose your interest by telling you the truth if it only cost him to throw a few ambiguous statements (like the ones above) here and there to keep you interested?
Do yourself a favor and run away from these guys, and if you want to do it with class, you can throw some ambiguous statements back at him, that way he will at least realize that he no longer has you.
4. The married or taken
It is a reality that married men cheat on their wives. So your chances of coming across a married man on dating apps or social media or even social gatherings are actually not null.
Some will be upfront and will tell you that they are married and are not looking for anything serious, but let’s be honest, most of them will not because they know you will lose interest if they do.
So how do you recognize the signs that the man is taken or married?
- If he is hiding you by taking you to private locations, remote places and not the trendiest place in town. when you feel he is doing everything to avoid being seen with you in public.
- When you are in public with him, he does not show any signs of affections or complicity.
- If he always seems paranoid when he is with you.
- If he never proposed to take you to his place for a tea or coffee.
- If he avoids showing you pictures of himself ( because most of them are probably with his wife or his real girl friend)
- When he never leaves his phone unguarded.
- When he hesitates to get intimate with you, trust me available men usually do not hesitate.
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5. The guy with resentment for women
If the guy has had bad experiences with women and developed resentment for them as a result, he is to be avoided at all costs.
This type of guy will make you pay for all the bad things that happened to him with other women…if he was always ignored by women and never had a girl friend, he will expect you to make up for all his singlehood years, chances are also that you were not his first choice and he only wants to be with you because he knows you are the best he can do (for now).
If he was cheated on, he will always doubt you and will become paranoid.
If he was taken advantage of by other women, he will not be as generous with you…so in any case, just avoid people who develop resentment…They are usually incapable of seeing their part of responsibility for what happens to them and think it’s all someone’s else fault…hence the resentment.
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6. The mama’s boy
Oh the Mama boy…
Does his mother still do his laundry? Is he always consulting with her for any decision he has to make? Does he call her for anything he needs? Do you feel that his mother is always present with you even though she is not physically there?
You can’t build a serious relationship with someone like that because he is actually incapable of having any type of relationship outside of his relationship with his mother.
There is a difference between loving his mother and being attached and dependent on her… Often times the mother does not want to let go of her son neither ( out of selfishness ) without realizing that she is preventing him from growing.
It’s is a crucial step in a man’s development to stop relying on his mother in order to move from boyhood to adulthood. So when your man has not done it, he will not have the maturity to have a serious relationship with you with all what it implies.
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7. The guy who does not have his life together
Everything is in the title, if he does not have his life together, it will not change miraculously because he is with you. People very rarely change and it usually takes a big wake up call for it to happen. So don’t bet on him changing for the better. That is probably just the way he is.
If he says he will change or he just needs time, tell him to let you know when he is done and if you are still available, you can see if you can build a relationship, but don’t wait around for someone who most probably has made excuses his entire life because that is the kind of person he is.
Remember that you can encounter these types of men online as well as in the real world, but your only chance to spot them is to actually meet in real life those you met via online dating sites and app.
This should not stop you from trying online dating because you will exclude a huge proportion of available men. Go ahead and create your online profile on sites like Elitesingles , Eharmony, Datingdirect,, richmeetbeautiful.com or Millionairematch.com for those looking for financially successful men, and try to meet the guy as early as you can, so that you do not build expectations based solely your imagination and ultimately save yourself from disappointment and waste of time.
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